Basically i'm 18, I've had several opportunities to have sex or do sexual things in the past, but i've always declined because I didn't feel ready, but lately i've begun to wonder if I ever want to do anything sexual. To be honest i'd only really try it or do it if I was in a really long term relationship with someone, so I guess you could say that I don't want sex before marriage. But on the other hand I do LOVE physical and emotional intimacy, basically everything that isn't sex, I love cuddling, kissing, snuggling in front of the TV, tickling guys, having long deep conversations, all of the general romantic and playful stuff. But not sex. I just feel like that is something that i'm not really up for, and I couldn't do unless I really really trusted someone. However, I feel a bit abnormal because most gay guys i've met are really comfortable sexually and are ready for sex pretty early into the relationship, and i've met a few who use sex as an ice breaker sometimes.
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Sex positivity is a great thing. While there are many reasons people choose to have sex pleasure, pleasing others, intimacy, stress relief, escape, or self-validation , there are plenty of other ways to meet these reasons without having sex. More importantly, being purely and wholly disinterested in sexual activity is a choice that needs to be respected. So, in a world that oversimplifies sex, it may be helpful to understand what never having sex really means and how to explain it to others.
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The answer, for men, would seem to be castration. Better than drink: it takes away both performance and desire. Plato, in The Republic, has Sophocles say that the end of sexual yearning is like escaping from a vicious tyrant, usually quoted as "being unchained from a lunatic". Visions of the madman vary; I always picture him naked, wild-haired and bearded, a bit like Terry Jones in Monty Python, capering and scampering into the distance across a rain-swept Clapham Common. Better have them off.
Anal sex is in. Six years later, anal is still going strong. By why is everyone talking about anal sex now?